Have any of you ever assumed that if you’re doing everything right—you’re conscientious, hard working, selfless, operating from integrity, guiding or mentoring others, that life should just be good? The day should never conspire against you? There shouldn’t be buckets of disappointments some days? AND, if you do encounter frustrations then you’re probably doing something wrong, not thinking correctly or being as smart as you know how to be; in other words, you’re to blame?
It is so easy to assume if we play by the rules, if we’re good grownups working hard to make the world a better place (working from our Super Hero positions) then the Universe will reciprocate, reward us for our goodness and smarts. However, that in itself is believing that by behaving in a certain way—cause and effect—we will affect different results, just based on our intentions.
And why am I writing this today? Because I noticed that the day seemed to be conspiring against me. One thing after another after another seemed to be tumbling in a downward spiral. Little disappointments, bigger aggravations, lots of incidental annoyances in between. And I found myself thinking, if I am living up to my beliefs and my understanding then these things cannot be happening, I must be doing something wrong, it must be me. This presupposes however that we are in control of everyone and everything around us. That we can always change fate by out attitude and vision. That stuff never just happens.
From years in New York City I learned if we wait for any external stimulation to feel happy we might be waiting a long time. It’s like getting on the subway and expecting people to suddenly look up and smile, to move instead of jostle or to allow you all the necessary time to get to, and get out the door when the car stops at a station (instead of making a headlong mad dash and hoping for the best). New Yorkers go by their own internal happiness meters.
And when a day conspires to make you feel that you caused it, that you created this reality, then it’s a good reminder to think back on what a Super Hero really is. She (or he) is usually thrust into an uncomfortable situation with bad guys trying to make things even worse. Does the Hero say “Hmm, I brought this on myself?” or does she realize the more we focus on inner strength/peace/joy the more we’ll be able to deal with the bad guys, or in this instance, the bad days that seem to be after us. We can realize things are just the way they are today, nothing more, nothing less. And that all the events—no matter how unexpected or disappointing—are lessons. We’ve done nothing wrong. It’s just the day, it’s not the Hero. And as my son reminded me in his own inimitable way, you’ve got your health, you’ve got us (family), you’ve got a place to live and food to eat…what’s the big deal? Leave it to family to remind us of how blessed we really are.
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