Have you ever noticed how some people you just like instantly, you cut them slack, feel better in their presence and overall are happier when they’re part of your life. Then there are others who you would gladly walk half a mile to avoid, if only you could.
Human nature being what it is, there are always going to be people we like more than others. Unfortunately it’s often those “others” that we find ourselves in the company of so often, whether it’s at work, in an organization, at a club meeting, a neighbor or somewhere else. Maybe we’re getting a lesson here, if we can’t figure out how to work with a certain type of person, we’re just going to keep running into clones of that person until we invest the energy and time into understanding their value and how to live and work in their presence.
What I often hear over and over when I go into companies to consult and teach, is how annoying, aggravating or an overall pain someone is. What I don’t hear nearly as often are words to the effect of, “how can we work better with each other?” No one said it’s easy sometimes, but what I continually ask myself is do I want to be right (I have all this evidence, my ego is yelling to go out and tell everyone I’M right) or do I want to get results. The answer is pretty obvious.
So, some quick tips on motivating different behavioral styles:
Judge: Give them control, give them power, stroke their egos, never take away any more control than you have to and help them think they always have choices. Focus on their results, appreciate their confidence, intelligence and determination.
Meteor: Look at all the ways they can interact with others and can be praised with others around. This might mean a celebratory lunch or pot luck party at the office, a memo to all singing their praises, acknowledgment in front of a meeting or any other arena where they can feed off the positive energy of others while doing their job or accomplishing their task.
Rock: Continually acknowledge their value to the team. Tell them and show them your appreciation, but mainly be sure they are aware of your respect. They prefer quiet, low-key opportunities to sing their praises.
Detailer: This style wants to be acknowledged for their hard work but needs you to communicate through the written word; emails are preferable to phone calls. Acknowledge their intellect, go into great detail on what you like and why, and feel free to copy others on your email as well.
Everything I’ve just mentioned is obvious. We work or play with these people and we know what they need and what makes them tick. And yet it’s easy to get busy and forget that others are not necessarily like us. One quick, example: A participant in one of my seminars said she knew a salesman who wanted to thank his personal assistant. He had a meeting planned with 500 people, and he wanted to bring her on stage, give her applause and flowers. He would have loved that kind of attention. However she was nothing like him, and never made it to the stage. She was so overwhelmed at the thought of being in front of 500 people that she spent the night in the bathroom crying.
We are all very different and what floats your boat, as they say, may not float mine. Our job is to realize and value these differences, and more than that be smart enough to understand what others need to feel safe, valued and motivated and then make sure to communicate that to them. Besides, just imagine how boring the world would be if everyone was just like us!
Post a Comment